Put bubbles in the kiddie pool

I was looking through my pictures today.

I remember this one time when I was about 7 years old. It was summer and we lived at the apartments on Las Lomas. I was next door playing with my neighbor, Lisa, and we decided to go swimming in the kiddie pool. Someone got the idea to pour a big bottle of bubbles into the water and as we played and splashed, the water started sudsing up. We swam around and around and around in circles and the water got more and more and more bubbly until we were up to our necks in bubbles. We were having the best day EVER! I can still remember thinking that "This is the most fun I've ever had."



Now, you can probably guess that I have had other fun since then. But this memory strikes me in a way other fun memories don't. And that's like this...I don't abandon myself to the fun anymore. There is a controlled containment to my fun now. I don't mean a, "I'm a grown woman and I can't act irresponsibly, so hold back on the crazy" kind of containment. I'm talking about a holding back. I don't think I really let myself enjoy certain things because deep down inside I think that it isn't dignified or mature. I think as I've gotten older, even though I am having fun in a given moment, the rest of life and the weight of it keeps my feet a little too soundly on the ground. I can't remember the last time I just threw my head back and let myself thoroughly enjoy the moment, and that makes me a little bit sad. I don't want my girls to hold back on their enjoyment of life, but here I am...their primary example.

So, I think I'm going to try and take a few notes from that girl in the picture. Don't take life so seriously. Lighten up, Shan...enjoy the moment. Be a seven year old girl once in a while and put bubbles in the kiddie pool. You just might have "the most fun you've ever had!"